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Thursday, April 7, 2022 – San Diego Tesla Driver Crashes On Top Of Ambulance
A driver trying to park their Tesla Model 3 in a hospital parking lot in San Diego ran over a curb, down a hill, and off a ledge…landing on top of a parked ambulance. The ambulance was empty at the time, and the driver and two passengers in the Tesla suffered only minor injuries. How did this happen? San Diego Fire-Rescue said the accident was caused by the driver “misapplying the accelerator when intending to brake,” and not the fault of the vehicle., which makes this a case of ‘wrong pedal.’

Wednesday, April 6, 2022 – Motorist Fined For Causing Cyclist To Fall From Bike Despite Not Even Touching Her
A man has been fined over $1,300 for ‘driving without due care or attention’ after his Land Rover Defender made a bicyclist fall into a ditch as he drove past. Paul Nigel Miley’s vehicle didn’t touch the cyclist, but police say he was still responsible, saying video of the incident from a helmet camera another cyclist was wearing ‘proved beyond doubt’ that Miley had shown no consideration for other users of the road. The video has been posted online, and many commenters can’t figure out what Miley could have done differently; Miley plead guilty to the charge and received five points on his license.

Tuesday, April 5, 2022 – Forklift Thief Leads Police On 18 MPH Chase For 20 Minutes
The Harris County Sheriff’s Office in Texas were involved in what could only be described as a low-speed chase over the weekend. After getting a call, deputies found someone driving a forklift on the road; the driver refused to stop and led deputies on a 20-minute-long chase at speeds up to around 18 miles per hour before he came to a stop and was arrested. After investigating, they determined the forklift was stolen and arrested 38-year-old Justin David Brown. The trip to jail was most likely quicker than the chase.

Monday, April 4, 2022 – Driving Instructor Arrested For DUI
Saturday night, Pasco County, Florida police arrested 54-year-old Gregory Sorensen after pulling him over. Troopers say he failed multiple sobriety tests and had a blood alcohol three times the legal limit, along with an open 24-pack of Natural Lite beer in the back seat of the student driver vehicle he was driving, and yes, it had “Student driver” on the side of the car in large yellow letters. Sorensen is a driving instructor; after the arrest, the Florida Highway Patrol tweeted out “Hopefully this isn’t part of the driving curriculum!”

 

Thursday, March 31, 2022 – Bride, Groom, And Best Man All Spend Wedding Night In Jail
A bride and groom were joined on their wedding night by the best man…in jail. The three were arrested in 2019 after the bride, Claire Goodbrand, attacked her mother with a stiletto while her new husband, Eamonn Goodbrand and his brother Kieran assaulted the mom’s partner. The fight was captured on CCTV, so why is this in the news now? Because the trio returned to court this week, where Claire finally pleaded guilty on a charge of assault to injury, and the two men pleaded guilty to assault. The judge set the sentencing hearing for April 29th, so it’s still not over.

Wednesday, March 30, 2022 – 71-Year-Old Man Arrested For Pickleball Crime
Pickleball is serious business for some people. A 71-year-old man has been released from jail after being arrested for using a permanent marker on a basketball court at Central Park Rec Center in Denver to mark the boundaries used for pickleball. Arslan Guney is facing a felony charge of criminal mischief for causing $10k in damage to the court. He’s now suspended from all Denver Rec Centers indefinitely and could get anywhere from one to three years in jail for criminal mischief.

Tuesday, March 29, 2022 – UK Police Find Stash Of Stolen Bikes So Big It Was Visible From Space
Police officers visiting a house in Oxford and found stolen bicycles…a lot of stolen bicycles. Hundreds of stolen bikes in a giant pile that filled the entire backyard of the house and is visible on Google Earth. The unnamed 54-year-old that lived at the address was arrested on suspicion of handling stolen goods and possession of stolen goods but was later released under investigation. The man’s neighbors say police were sorting through the hundreds of bicycles, presumably to try to return them to their owners.

Monday, March 28, 2022 – Teenager Arrested For Cake-Related Crimes
Omaha, Nebraska police arrested a 17-year-old yesterday for charges resulting from breaking into a bakery and smashing the cakes onto cars in the parking lot. It sounds like a stupid crime until you realize that police also found five trash cans on fire, several vehicles with broken windshields, and 30 vehicles with their tires slashed. The teen was booked on multiple charges, and police believe several other teenagers were involved. Authorities say the investigation is ongoing.

 

Friday, March 25, 2022 – Smugglers Try To Float SUV Full Of Weed Across Rio Grande
Using a trailer and empty 55-gallon drums for flotation devices, smugglers used a Chevy Trailblazer to transport 648 pounds of marijuana across the Rio Grande River near Brownsville, Texas this week. Border Patrol officers say this isn’t a common way to get drugs into America, but they’ve seen it before. The Trailblazer was spotted by agents who intercepted it after it landed, where the driver jumped back into the river and swam back to Mexico. The seized weed has a street value of over $500k.

Thursday, March 24, 2022 – Woman Calls 911 In Ohio Because KFC Only Gave Her Four Nuggets
A woman in Euclid, Ohio called 911 for what she felt was an emergency. She told a dispatcher that she paid for eight nuggets at the drive-thru window of a KFC, but she only received four, saying “I only got four pieces of chicken and I want my chicken.” The dispatcher told her there was nothing they could do, but she insisted on speaking with a policeman. An officer was dispatched and told the woman he couldn’t help her. Euclid Police Chief Scott Meyer said, “While we are here to serve the public, an incorrect drive-thru order is not a police matter.”

Wednesday, March 23, 2022 – Man Driving Stolen Car Runs Out Of Gas During Chase Because He ‘Couldn’t Afford To Fill It Up’
The price of gas is causing problems for everyone right now. Deputies in Michigan responded to an alarm going off at a rural home and found a man fleeing the scene. The car’s license plate came back as having been stolen from Grand Rapids and they started chasing him, but that didn’t last for long. The thief, 41-year-old Jared Thielbar ran out of gas during his attempted escape. According to press reports, the reason Thielbar had broken into the house was because he couldn’t afford to put gas in his stolen car and was trying to steal some from the home. To no one’s surprise, the list of charges he’s being held on includes ‘open intoxicants in a motor vehicle.’

Tuesday, March 22, 2022 – Florida Woman Hides In Woods From Deputies, Had Glass Pipe In Her Privates Deputies with the Marion County Sheriff’s Office in Florida responded to multiple calls of a reckless driver in a Circle K parking lot around 2 a.m. Tuesday. The driver, identified as 42-year-old LaToya Nichole Ashe, refused to stop and drove away, later pulling into another parking lot and running on foot into a patch of woods to hide. Police brought in a helicopter to track her and eventually found her in some underbrush where deputies say she had a “strong odor of alcoholic beverage on her breath” and a glass pipe with traces of meth inside hidden inside her…private parts. She denied being the driver of the vehicle, which did nothing to avoid charges of possession of drug paraphernalia, fleeing and eluding police, smuggling contraband in a jail, and driving with a suspended license.

Monday, March 21, 2022 – Tucson Woman Accused Of Gambling Away $5m In Embezzled Funds
Helen Dahlstrom is accused of gambling away $5.3 million she embezzled from two construction companies and an HOA in Mexico. The embezzlement is said by authorities to have occurred between September 2013 and July 2020 by writing checks made out to cash. She’s charged with multiple counts of fraudulent schemes and artifices, theft, computer tampering, forgery, and money laundering. No word on what games she was playing to lose over $5 million over the course of seven years, but it’s safe to say she wasn’t good at any of them.